Tuesday, n. 1. The day that refuses mythology. Named for a god of war but given over to oil changes. 2. A unit of time in which nothing is asked and everything is performed. 3. The hinge between weeks—not the opening, not the closing, but the moment the door is neither. 4. (Meteorological) A visibility of 1800 metres through which all obligations remain legible. 5. (Archaic) From the Proto-Germanic *tīwas dagaz, meaning: the day you carry a box to the garage and feel, briefly, the weight of completion. 6. (Colloquial) What you call the day after, when someone asks what you did and you say "nothing, really" and mean the opposite.